Danny Meyer founded the restaurants Union Square Cafe, Gramercy Tavern, and the chain Shake Shack. He is known in the restaurant industry for his best-selling book Setting the Table which describes his intentional approach to hospitality.
One of the most fascinating points he makes is regarding prepositions. He writes, “Hospitality is present when something happens for you. It is absent when something happens to you. Those two simple prepositions—for and to—express it all.”
”For” means we are left feeling that someone has made us a priority, while “to” creates the opposite emotion.
“For” looks for opportunities to serve (in the best sense of that word), “to” simply completes a transaction without particular concern as to how the other person feels.
Of course, these two preparations and their differences apply to any relationship, not just between server and someone ordering food off a menu.
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